An example of a microaggression that I experienced this week unfortunately happened in the workplace. In my job with a child welfare program here in FL, I am one of the youngest caseworkers in my office. Unfortunately, this microaggression occurred from a co-worker onto me. During a conversation about a difficult case she said, “You are so young, Vanessa. You need some time to develop a thick skin, hopefully when you are my age, you’ll get it.” Without going into detail about what those “things” are, I was a bit offended in that a. she assumed that because of my age I was less capable of handling a challenging situation than she. And b. that she made me feel somewhat inadequate because I was handling the situation differently than she. 
To be honest, I was frusterated, angry, and took offense to her comment. I take pride in the fact that I am at the age I am and have accomplished what I have in my career and experience working with children and families thus far. While I agree that with time, comes more wisdom, in any situation, I do not think my co-worker’s comments were necessary, constructive, or respectful. Though I do not think she meant any malice, I did address the comments and stood up for myself. I informed her that while I look forward to the professional experiences and wisdom time will bring, it made me feel inadequate and that in such as stressful job that we both do, the office should be a place of cohesion and support, not a place to compare and/or rate each other’s professional capabilities. I also felt relieved that our supervisor was present for this and I did not have to address it further. My experience with microaggression this week definitely brought home Dr. Sue’s explanation of microinvalidation. I agree that just because ill will or insult is not intended, it does not make discriminatory, prejudicial, or stereotypical comments, behaviors, or environments acceptable (Laureate Education, 2010). I think that sometimes we as receivers of microaggressions must remember a basic psychological principle: when one points out the shortcomings of another, they simply are compensating for those they have with themselves!
References
Laureate Education, Inc. (Producer). (2010). “Microaggressions in Everyday Life” [Video webcast]. Retrieved from http://sylvan.live.ecollege.com/ec/crs/default.learn?CourseID=6284779&Survey=1&47=8983925&ClientNodeID=984650&coursenav=1&bhcp=1
Vanessa,
ReplyDeleteCan I just say Amen? What was your coworkers reaction to your explanantion of your feelings? I can also understand that experience comes with times. But if someone was a childhood victim of alcohol abuse, and they pursued a profression in helping children in the same situation, would they still then have to of a certain "age" to have the experience? Not at all.
Tina
Vanessa,
ReplyDeleteI also experienced ageism, actually I experience it all the time. I am the youngest teacher at my school... by at least 4 years. I know I am young, but I am also very skilled at my craft and others should recognize that. I often think that people assume that only with age you get good at your skill set. In reality there are people everywhere who are good, great and bad.
Great post!
Abby
Vanessa,
ReplyDeleteGood for you standing up for yourself and making your co-worker aware of the microaggression! The more we make people aware of this injustice, the better our chances of preventing the spread of such harmful indignities.
Great post!
Cymantha Channey-White
Oh, yeah.....and I love the cartoon clip :)
ReplyDeleteGreat clip, Vanessa!
CCWhite